A Clean Slate

Christmas is not going to really feel like Christmas this year. I'm kind of trying to bypass the holidays. I've decided to stay in town instead of making yet another trip to TN (that would make trip number three in just three months.) And also since I've gotten a job I don't want to take any days off.

Christmas is just one day anyway. A few of my friends have been super sweet and invited me to join their families for Christmas. As much as I appreciate it, I don't really want to spend Christmas with a family that isn't my own. It's a bit melancholy thinking of Christmas this year because I've spent most Christmases since I moved to Florida with my now ex-best friend's family, whom I considered family.

But it is what it is.

This last month of the year has been better. More clarity and progress. Moving along with my goals, but I am ready for a new year. I hate sounding pessimistic and pardon my lack of eloquence, but this year has SUCKED.

To be more insightful, and to look at it in a less superficial light- everything I went through was extremely necessary. This year wiped the slate clean in a sense. I was forced to deal with circumstances I certainly didn't want to. Things that had been brewing for a while.

2011 was a year of extremes. Extreme lows and extreme highs. When it was good it was fantastic, and exciting and thrilling. When it was bad, oh my God was it painful.

I've gained more independence, confidence, and the huge blessing of knowing what I want. It was a rough road to figuring out what I truly want my life to be, with a lot of surprising twists. Overall it was an exciting adventure. Exciting and exhausting.

Looking back at it, I kinda feel like a badass. I got through this year very alone. I drove across country for God's sake! I moved to a huge city not really knowing anyone. Although it made me more independent, I also learned that we're not meant to do things all alone. Relationships are one of the main points of life. We're here for each other. We're here to love, love, love and love some more.